An effective apology focuses more on compassion for the victim than redemption for the offender.
Apology calls for a willingness to sacrifice on behalf of the wronged party and the inherent value of the relationship, not for what it brings to you but for what you can bring to it.
You can't talk your way out of a situation you acted you way into.
No apology is equal to the task set before it.
Apology may start as a feeling, a desire to make matters right, but it requires a commitment to move that desire into practice, to actually take on the great courageous task of showing compassion to others.
We rarely wrestle with apology and lose.
An effective apology contains within it the answer to the question, "How am I to be held accountable?"
Apology is the practice of extending ourselves because we value the relationship more than we value the need to be right.
Apologies have more power than most of us realize to restore strained relationships, free us from vengeful impulses, and create possibilities for growth.
Apology sends the clearest signal that we have the strength of character to reconcile ourselves with the truth.
The purpose of apology is to extend ourselves in such a way that relationships become deeper, and life becomes richer and more human in the process.
Progress occurs one apology at a time.
When we apologize we end our struggle with history.
"I would like to apologize" may sound like an apology, but it is no more an actual apology than saying "I would like to lose weight" makes you suddenly slimmer.
You don't have to see eye-to-eye to walk hand-in-hand. You just have to want to go in the same direction.
We value apology in the abstract, but turn our backs on it in practice.